Where did my life go?

As I was scrubbing my feet with my foot scrubber in the shower this morning I thought, "this is the closest to a pedicure I'm going to get for a while...." Sad thought.

I've always been pretty self-conscious about my looks. I ALWAYS have to have on some sort of foundation/tinted moisturizer to even out my horrendous skin tone and to cover up my acne and teen acne scars. I've never had nice skin, something I have been waiting for now that I am no longer a teenager! I always have on mascara and let's not forget my eyebrows. Ugh. If I could change any part of my looks I'd totally skip over my fat baby belly and all the sag that comes with pregnancy and get new eyebrows! I don't even know where to start...they are too thin and too light. I call my eyebrow hair color invisible because they pretty much are. I have let them grow out but all those Jr. High days of over-plucking have taken a toll. I have to fill in my brows every freaking day with shadow and I loathe it. I wish I had enough courage to leave the house looking like shit. But I don't.

I used to get my hair cut and colored every 5-6 weeks. On the dot. I never missed. Now I color my hair from the box making my hair dry and brittle and I haven't had a haircut in about 6 months....

Now my obsession is anti-aging. I was a lifeguard for the City of Henderson for 7 years. That means 7 summers in the sun all day, every day. I was pretty good about using sunscreen but I was a teenager. I didn't use it religiously like I should have. Now I am constantly putting sunscreen on my face, chest and neck. If we only knew then what we know now.

29 Weeks

What happened to my cute little figure? Well, I have never been little, 5'9" with long legs and ginormous hips. But I used to be fit. I had a nice figure. I didn't feel awkward in my clothes like I do now. My boobs don't sit the same way anymore....I have MOM BOOBS! Ugh. I know that's what comes with being pregnant and having a baby. Your body truly is never the same. But I want my comfort back! I was tipping the scales at 199 when I was 41 weeks prego and ready for my stubborn little girl to get out of me already! That was 40lbs of pregnancy I put on. The unexpected C-Section completely threw me for a loop. It was a lot longer recovery than I had imagined. I had the baby blues so bad I cried constantly and my husband didn't know what to do with me. I gained more weight than I wanted to and I can't find the motivation to get rid of it...until now.41 Weeks Day of Induction

I have decided that I deserve to feel good. Here's to exercising, eating better and getting rid of the baby belly all together! (at least until I get pregnant again) :)